Waiting in Wonder
When I was pregnant with my son, I wanted a devotional that followed the pregnancy and helped me prep myself spiritually for the new life within me. I found one titled "waiting in wonder" and was not disappointed in it. It was precisely what I'd been looking for. I found myself Journaling and reading from it again during my pregnancy with my daughter.
And now, in this advent journey I have rediscovered it..
Advent is a time of waiting. It too is a pregnancy of sorts. As we remember Mary's "yes" to letting Christ reside within her, we too are invited to carry Christ in us.
We are pregnant with the anticipation of Christ's coming and we cannot help but rejoice. Especially on this 3rd Sunday of advent, literally "rejoice" Sunday where when lighting the rose candle we are looking forward to Christmas and all its glory, and the joy bubbles out. Not anxiety of all that needs to be done before Christmas, but joy because we can see what is coming off in the distance and it is good!
Although I have heard these things many years over and the story has not changed- Christ came in to the world humbly to save us. He is our salvation - it is good to repeat. And I find I am feeling it all a little more vibrantly this advent because, well.. I too am pregnant.
We just learned in the last two weeks that we have another little one growing in my womb, and we have so many reasons to rejoice.
Now I know if you read my older posts you may recall that we were trying to wait, to space these beautiful blessings a little farther, and to that end we have.. But if you are thinking "see, that nfp stuff doesn't work" let me put your mind at ease. We did not follow the guidelines to a T this past month, knowing full well we could conceive, and we did. It was a conscious decision we made. We both realized we reached a point of balance in our lives. And while more time might be nice, we would be OK of God chose to bless us this time. We are always open to new life and willing to see God work through us.
But that doesn't mean I am not worry free. These littles will be close as well, I haven't weaned my daughter and I had a mild panic as I realized we will now be "outnumbered". I'm choosing to hand these worries to God and focus on the joy to come!
(Originally written on Dec 13th, never posted as morning sickness took over and fatigue held me to the couch for much of the last few months)